i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
