ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
