Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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