just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I didn't notice because vodka
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize