David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
