In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Can I color on your dick again?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
