his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Church boner. Awkwardddd
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
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