Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize