and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize