I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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