In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
You're a waste of cheezeits
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
When are your genitals available?
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin