the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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