It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize