Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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