I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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