Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
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she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
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Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.