So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
