She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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