Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
