The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize