I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
