You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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