Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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