I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
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I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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