the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Randomize