just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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