The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
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This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
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he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.