If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Here’s Why Hotel Photos On Travel Websites Are A Complete Hoax
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify