they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
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