Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?

  (313): View more from Michigan

  YES

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  (586): If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct? (313): YES http://tfl.nu/udyu
  Replies (14) Good night (2055) Bad night (421)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate

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  (407): I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate http://tfl.nu/yf54
  Replies (64) Good night (4649) Bad night (870) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing

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  (201): he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing http://tfl.nu/t0vu
  Replies (51) Good night (1233) Bad night (5303) Order T-Shirt
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many

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  (319): You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many http://tfl.nu/z652
  Replies (8) Good night (4761) Bad night (946) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.

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  (715): she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner. http://tfl.nu/8r7t
  Replies (14) Good night (1040) Bad night (2687) Order T-Shirt
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.

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  (985): Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world. (504): That's so nerdy and hot at the same time. http://tfl.nu/tw1i
  Replies (2) Good night (2311) Bad night (566)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?

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  (570): there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i? http://tfl.nu/asxg
  Replies (5) Good night (1606) Bad night (433)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..

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  (570): Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me.. http://tfl.nu/j14b
  Replies (5) Good night (975) Bad night (470) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL

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  (201): I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL http://tfl.nu/z2bq
  Replies (7) Good night (1387) Bad night (353) Order T-Shirt
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.

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  (803): Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in. http://tfl.nu/noz8
  Replies (2) Good night (688) Bad night (351) Order T-Shirt
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.

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  (801): Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight. http://tfl.nu/rr81
  Replies (10) Good night (725) Bad night (210) Order T-Shirt
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  (585): View more from New York

  we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT

  (1-585): View more from New York

  Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.

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  (585): we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT (1-585): Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink. http://tfl.nu/wawv
  Replies (3) Good night (699) Bad night (167)
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  (315): View more from New York

  at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing

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  (315): at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing http://tfl.nu/t14u
  Replies (3) Good night (672) Bad night (402) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass

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  (541): Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass http://tfl.nu/kkwh
  Replies (1) Good night (906) Bad night (147)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night

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  (717): i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night http://tfl.nu/ncnb
  Replies (2) Good night (320) Bad night (116) Order T-Shirt

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