The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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