i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize