Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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