Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Randomize
