We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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