I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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