i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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