If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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