Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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