yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
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Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
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If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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