We're like a lot better than the average bears
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"