I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize