I love having hate sex.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
