oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize