I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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