I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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