so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize