i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was CRYING into my vagina
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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