But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
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