Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize